I Paint My Word

We met

2007-04-18T09:50:00.000-07:00

Im happy..

and im happy that u are ok..=)

i dunno..i just feel happy n glad if u are happy..

=)

i miss you..

i really do..

i love you..

i want you to know that..

i keep on saying that alot of time..

i mean it...

2007-04-16T02:48:00.000-07:00

im sorry i cant giv you the sim card n cardreader..

im sick.

ATTENTION

2007-04-14T10:49:00.000-07:00

I'm not using this blog anymore..

instead, this blog is still dedicated to the person that i love most..

and although he thought that i dont still love him..

he is wrong..

i love him with all of my heart..

I just need time to get my mind clear..

so when i start back anew, i wont tynk about the past..

the bad times..

the time when i was not being appreciated..

and i want him to reflect on his own too

I waNT BOTH OF US TO LEARN FROM OUR MISTAKES..

this might be the start of the 'suffering' for both of us..

but it will help us learn..

i dunno how to say it to him..

everytyme when he called,

my heart jump for joy..

i love to hear his voice..

i want to hug him n kiss him..

but then he will keep on asking me about the same question..

that makes me feel irritated...

i don't want you to go baby..

but its not fair for you if you stay..

i dunno wat i want..

help me..

start from anew..

when im the most special person u whom u never had before..

when im the one you kiss and stare at everytyme..

and you will say how lucky u are to have me..

how happy you are to have me..

i was from plaza sinagpura..

remember?at dellifrance?

when i tricked you?

i look at our table, i can see us der..

i cried..

i swear i did...

when you call..

when you cry;..

im feeling ur tears..

im a bad person..

coz after u cried when ur late dad passed away,

i told myself..

not to let u cry..

not to let u be in trouble..

not to let you be hurt...

but i did..

and im sorry..

i know you would hate me..

i know you might think that im bad..

but i am sure one day we will be together again...
and by then i hope you would realise and understand why am i doin this...

"SEPARATION MAKES THE HEART GROW FONDER"

this is our relationship sayang..

its our own love story..
different from others..

there will only be one danasan..
and thats you...

this blog is dedicated to you MUHD FARID...
and since i dunno how to get thru u,
i will just type it here..

as a letter from me to you..
and i hope as days goes by....

you will not stop reading this blog...

i love you.

Kiss on ur forehead*muacksz* Kiss on ur nose*muacksz* Kiss on ur cheek*muacksz* Kiss on ur other cheek*muacksz* Kiss on ur lips*muacksz* Kiss on ur chin*muacksz* And a LOOOOONG WET KISS ON UR LIPS AGAIN*MUuUuuUAaAACKSz*

Is this the end?

2007-04-10T11:20:00.000-07:00

its raining heavily at orchard..

Then went to insound studio(i tynk its da name)

gawsh.. i learn many new tyngs der..lol!

and my new friend is nice=)

that's all i can say for now..haha

aniwae, me n fred broke up..

den tyngs are ok..

den its back to not..

i dnno..

i miss him..

i love him..

gawsh i want him so much..

but is this all good for me?

Must i deserve all this just coz i love him?

Does that mean i havta put my family behind?

Or sacrifice again n again while all he tynk about is money that came out from his wallet?

i dun deserve this..

As im typing my tears fall down..

its been fallin non stop..

does he noe how hurt am i?

how he did since the first tyme we r togeder till now affects me?

how he..

fuck!

ders too much to say..

but im lazy to type..

fuck it!!\

fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck!!!!!

i tynk im beter off being alone..

i dun deserve anyone in this life!!!!31-20wuqhsjb

bah!! why m i so damn stupid in saying all this??

wtf

1!!@oiojhewbsdfvr8g02l!!!!!!!!

new me

2007-04-10T01:14:00.000-07:00

I PERM MY HAIR AT LAST

Thanks to Uncle Awie, the designer guy..=)

the one who did my hair since small..

Lush winning and Fitness BBQ

2007-04-08T08:49:00.000-07:00

Congrats to Lush for winning the stomp the floor this year!!
Its a big improvement after so long.
And besides, we manage to shut FLUSH up..
hah! in your face muthafucka!
LoL!!

Aniwae, was der during semis.. but havta go home ryte wen lush started their item..
im sorry guys!
den i have fitness training bbq the next day so didnt getta watch the finals..
im sorry again!
but i cant wait for the fitness show thats gonna happen soon!
At last i getta dance again!

So yeah, the BBQ..
its dissappointing to see not many come..
besides, those who came is Amirul, Siti, Nazmi, Van, Ahmad arab, Ahmad rauther, Reyhan n gf, and my sister, kuzzin n kuzzin bf.. dats all..
i spend more den my own budget for this..
haiz..
but its all good..
its a memorable one tho.. good and bad..
oh ya, i fell off a bicycle in front of many guys!
embarassing sia!!
and we had much fun talking crap non stop!!
and slack lazily under the hot scorching sun..

haaa~~ its all good overall..

here are sum pics..

STOMP THE FLOOR

credits to nyonya..lalalaa~

elly n me

Filz n me.. arent we just so sepet??

lovely vega.. she join with other group for this competition

I love this bitch of mine! syam!!

Dee says she look ugly in this pic.. no ryte??

Naz n me at stomp the floor

FITNESS BBQ

The 3 person that never fails to NOT buey..

With my Labu n Labi

he is dumber then me..

We are loving it!

Raining on a bloody SUNday

Go figure boys!!

Love them to bits! My colour of life.

How irritating can dey be..

Anak monyet

bonker us

Its just US overnyte at the pit..

Trying to fit in..lols!

its fun afterall..=)

random thoughts

2007-04-08T08:11:00.000-07:00

I was already lost n confused..
I didnt know what i want and what is best for me..
I'm stuck in making my decision..

Then you came and broke my rules..
You came and held me down..
You make me weak to my knees..
Its not suppose to happen..
But then it did..
I try to stop it..
But i sumhow go on..

And now im more confused..
Why he came to me..
Am i just a companion out of boredom?

I need answers..
Im scared.. I feel so stupid n dumb..
I don't wanna tynk about it..
I wanna get on with my life..
But the picture of you is in my head..
Its sumhow haunting me..

A secret i could keep,
a secret i cannot tell,
a secret that no one knows,
and a secret that will just be a pain in me n me alone..

*sigh*

two days with rockstar

2007-04-03T19:16:00.000-07:00

On Mondayfated=)

if only this is never ending..

On Tuesday

my life saver
da guy hu loves to smirk
macaroni n cheese for him which turns out to be urmm.. sick

he is just acting cute..=X

he's so pissed coz i have cleavage problem! LoL!

*smiles*

big-butt-my-not....=X

its a beautiful day whenever im with you..
skinny bitch

I went to accompany rockstar on monday to ubi den we went to vivo.. It was a lovely day.. suddenly everytyng seems right.. we went to watch number23.. its a fucking good movie.. u guys shud watch.. i feel so needed now.. he never fail to tell me how much he miss me and all.. mebbe tyngs are gettin better=)

On tuesday we went sentosa.. suppose to meet him at 10am bu then he didnt wake up! so at 9 plus i ask kak shikin for a favour to call him and wake him up.. thanks kak shikin=) so we went sentosa. Ders many small fight here n there but then he's da one who in the end make me smile.. And now he did alot for me.. in terms of finance but i cant pay him now.. i mean i have enuff just for myself which i can predict be taken by mommy.. i dunno.. im waitin for my pay or mebbe my insurance money.. den i wud pay him watever he did fer me..

ikea house

2007-03-31T01:35:00.000-07:00

its raining on a bloody saturday.
sigh.
well, im so tired..
my family sort of 'renovate' the whole house with all the ikea suff. Now my house smells like ikea.LoL.
so now i have a bed n blind for my room and i even install a fan in my room.Cause aircon is not good for your muscles.and i just realise now that my room is small. I miss my old house.Now my living room is half the size of my 2nd previous living room. n my room is like quarter of my 2nd previous room.well, at least we have a house=)

And yesterday we went to giant IMM(not tamp..oh no!).its not crowded which makes me go crazy running around and just grab watever i wanna buy and put it in the trolley..=D my mom went crazy too so its a good thing as my dad wont nag at us for spending.haha!

Then we went off to bowling with dad. I feel the tension wen my dad is der. I want to make my dad be proud of me so dats why i pursue bowling too. And i pursue soccer as i noe i can learn alot from soccer like ur muscle control n alertness.besides, its healthy.. but i really hope my dad wud support me in dancing..So aniwae, was at CDANS with my dad and i kept on throwing the ball to the gutter!its so not me! i wasnt relax at all.. as my dad keeps on looking at how i play.. and tonight there is this bowling league at chevron and my mom sign me up. haiz..

I miss dancing. I want to dance , to perform or participate in events with Lush but its been long since i dance and i slack ALOT. I missed out alot of songs. That's why i dun volunteer myself for stomp the floor.I dun want lush to lose because of me. The geylang west competition was enuff for me.oh my!

I miss wawa,haiyu n nuhad. i even miss 4a3. coz my class now kinda sucks.. criuzly.. we are not united. sum ppl got the wrong impression abt me.tynking dat im sluttish or 'minah2'..wtf!!! mebbe coz im not the sport kinda person.. mebbe coz my feminine side shows.. mebbe coz im kinda bitchy... ouh fuck dem, dey dun determine my certs in sch.

aniwae, shakira n beyonce look alike urh!! n deir vid clip beautifulliar is so damn hot!!

kak shikin burfdae celebration wih pics

2007-03-29T20:58:00.000-07:00

this is dee's idea..

this is not suppose to be emo..

i dunno wat im doinfilz! look at the camera!

otw home.. im damn late okae!=D

back to the streets.. literally... hahha

i dunno wat style shud i do..

L.U.S.H can see dat? lol!!

i love this pic.

zuhri's idea

look at my hair!!

elly's pose is nice!

the perfect shot

look at dee!!

oh ya, zuhri's the cameraman fer da day..=D

this is all dancers yall...

ok!fine! i look ugleeeh..

suker ekh filz tepuk2 tangan..hahahahaha

u need model fer pantene?

my hairs all over

random

hahaha!! lukatmaface!

n i dunno wats zuhri's hand is trying to do..

ma lips are fineeee..=p

onda phone with rockstar.. he was askin me wen m i goin back..lol!

its suppose to be mango.. well..

thnx eh kak shikin? hahahaha!!

i love this shot..

me n dee

me n malique

we took this once n we gt it!

even hafiz wanna do it!

sumonelooksobigindispic..=X

my left n right pillar=)

hearts this two=)

ok..i cheated..

the cutest..=D

token of appreciation fm kak shikin

u saw dat person behind me?

we took one more n so we noe wen to jump..

like pengantin horrrr

dee arm n me

ok..i sux at it..

so i pose.. only..

dey do with two legs..i do with one=)=)

she cried okae!!

and da cakes nice.. so i dig in..lalalaala..

the cake is super duper finger licking good!!

ITS HORRIBLE!!

while kak shikin is gone.. we dig in the cake..lol!

im gettin redy to go out..

waiting fer the arrival of the bdae girl.

i dunno if its girl or woman..

we were gettin bored waiting fer her!

me with malique's lollipop

its kak shikin's bdae so we celebrate..

then at nyte met elly n filz n zuhri..

we camwhore n jumpwhore....=D

this is my holiday

2007-03-27T20:57:00.000-07:00

im so damn bored at home
so i played my lappy on my new bed!!
got tired of bed n lappy... sheesh.. im a retard..
so i microwave my yesterday pizza
oh ya, im addicted to orange juice too..
so i played the comp..

seriously, holiday sucks.. alot.. haiz...

convo with fadfad

2007-03-27T19:08:00.000-07:00

[A-f-a-d]Letters to you..[Fisahbilillah] says:
my pantat besar oso sey

[A-f-a-d]Letters to you..[Fisahbilillah] says:
bahahaha

°nyonya c HolidaySucks• says:
lol!! eksen urh pantat besar!!

°nyonya c HolidaySucks• says:
hahahah

[A-f-a-d]Letters to you..[Fisahbilillah] says:
more sexy than urs okie

°nyonya c HolidaySucks• says:
lols!!!

[A-f-a-d]Letters to you..[Fisahbilillah] says:
hahahah! my pantat sexy okie! so weird sey

[A-f-a-d]Letters to you..[Fisahbilillah] says:
gagagaga

°nyonya c HolidaySucks• says:
im soooo putting it in my blog...lols!

hhahah!!
to fad fad.. go figure

deep shyte! lol!

2007-03-27T09:30:00.000-07:00

been reading people's blog and i havta say their post are all so deep. and my post is full of pictures.. lol!

okok..
since now im like alone in my room waiting fer sleep to come..
i might as well talk 'deep'..

one tyng that worries me is me n rockstar..
people might be thinking why the hell do i still stick with him despite him being nasty towards me..
but seriously, he is not that mean..
and its not that i put him first before my family..
look at my family..
we kinda like torn apart tho we are together..
parents who think they are 100% right..
and a sister which is goin thru a teenagers life..so to her, friends first..
im left alone.. so he is the only one i can depend on...

yes2 i know..
he is well.. not nice if i want to put it..
wen he speaks..
and he way he treats me is abit..
well, not romantic..
so why the hell must i go to a guy that dont love me..

this is when maybe sum of u experience it b4,
when ppl tot ur bf's an asshole when u urself ONLY knows that he is not..
we stick to each other side for 1 yr plus..
yes2, i look at other guys during that 1 yr plus while he looks at other girls,
but isnt this what we call relationship?

when we fought and wen i refuse to give in,
he was the one who said "if i dun love you, why the fuck am i still with you for more than a year?!"
haha! its true tho..
and sumtymes wen we never meet each oder fer more den 5 days,
the mushy2 msges started to flood my inbox..
and i love every single one of it..
haha..

gawsh i love him!
our relationship isnt boring..
and i always take it as a challenge..
and i wonder what comes next..

beside, his family is super nice to me..
it really felt like my own family..
i feel comfortable in his house..
under his arms..

i miss him..
sumtymes i wish we are married..
den we dun havta go thru many sleepless nights missing each oder..
or never get to see or touch or cuddle..

i think sum of u girls get wat i mean..

i may sound so well.. i dunno but malay called it KENTAL..
well, try being in love then...

out of boredom

2007-03-26T22:42:00.000-07:00

that's my gilbert..=D
look how my wawa grown!!
sumone say im cocky..

thats adek's digi called mary..-_-"
citigem...
at ikea
tired
splasm

welcome arya arisha!!

2007-03-25T20:38:00.000-07:00

the adorable anak jepun!!
kak shikin, lush's pillar
i miss em!!
my canon dc40

okok.. been long i never update.. just that too much been happening all at the same time..

like once i fought wih my parents.. dey dun understand my passion.. my interest.. dey see the bad side of me.. dey even wan me to stop dancing! i miss lush now.. i was about to go back dancing n dis happens.. i miss all of em.. especially kak shikin n dee.. dey were der.. to giv me advice..

then i went back to kampong... i dissappear myself fer 3 days w/o anyone even rockstar knowing.. just need to relax my mind.. rockstar was so pissed... but in the end we are ok... n we missed each other so much.. kinda like an answer to my r/s...=)

and kak girl's new born baby!!17 march is the day arya arisha came out of her stomach! lol! and kak girl look slimmer but still cute tho! even her baby hav her own natural beauty! she got her own unique look, different then oder new born...

den the shoppig spree... my dad got his insurance money.. and we have been shopping but saving too.. i bought lots of stuff from mango n topshop.. n even laptop!! woohooo!! at last i can do my work!! yeah! i even bought the videocam dc40!!at last, after more then 10 yrs we have been suffering since the bankruptcy(is dat how its spelt?).. m

y family finally made it.. i hope it stays this way.. meaning we havta save..=) all i can say is alhamdullillah..

summarise..

i miss kak shikin n dee n other LUSH

i miss dancing

income stable

my relationship have meanings to it

and welcome to the world arya arisha!!

attica pic2 plus de blaze pic

2007-03-14T10:14:00.000-07:00

Pictures with de blaze during dancework'07

Lush girls @ attica

testing the camera flash
LUSH... but not all are here...
nyonya's back
i love this pic!!
the two indonesian lush.

Lush @ attica was great. Dj play great music n the atmosphere was okae.. okok, im still not 18 yet but then again, lush can go to courtyard.. haha! coz elly's fren celebrated her bdae oso at attica n der are like lotsa underage n so underage must wear a tag.. those with tags cant go courtyard or drink or smoke... well,u guys shud noe all this.. but yeah.. we just went to the courtyard n the bouncer juz didnt check us..haha!t was fun tho.. started back dancing.. tho i didnt dance fer all songs.. as i dunno much..hahah!

attica pic

2007-03-13T12:18:00.000-07:00

arab me n naz.. (the photographer ask to pose sexy!!)
havin fun with lush n quisher..(its arab's first tyme!! =D )
filzy n zaihar... i manage to grab it..haha

dats all fer now.. i'll put more after askin frm dee n elly the pics..hahaha!!

the momo n yp performance pic

2007-03-11T06:10:00.000-07:00

wen i was dancing, he just stand.. sheesh
i miss dis crazy fella!
lush girls with red singtel van..
qamah jill me renni n me
kak shikin n me
syam n me
zuhri n me

firstly, i miss dancin..

secondly, i miss clubing..

i dance n i wanna dance again.. so now waiting to know wens nex praact..hahahaha!

n dat tyme i went momo.. yup2.. bring rockstar.. n rai n his fren..

but then inside me n rockstar met with qamah n yat..

basically dats all..=D

i havta say.. 3 days with rockstar had been fun.. i dun want it to end.. it's like we are meant to be together.. not apart n separated.. i miss him now.. im waiting n counting.. to the day wen i get to ee him again.. n hug him and cuddle n kiss... oh gawsh.. i miss him so much..!!!

FUCK LAR!

2007-03-10T07:54:00.000-08:00

TO ZULOBO N ROCKSTAR

2007-03-10T07:13:00.000-08:00

firstly, to ROCKSTAR..

please stop adding fuel to fire? just leave it alone ayte baby? he'll stop eventually..
and STOP MENTIONING STUFF THAT U SHOULDNT SAID IN MY BLOG WHERE PEOPLE ACTUALLY DO READ!!!
look.. i noe ur pissed.. but limits.. u gotta control watever u wanna say..im sorry if this tyme round ppl all around are trying to stop us from being together..

i love you..

and to ZULOBO,

i know we hav been together before.. and im sorry but its ur fault that we are not now.. n im glad.. i found sumone better.. tho it may not be in oder people's eye.. i love him with all my heart.. and i dun need anyone to stop me n tell me wats right or wrong.. u noe how stubborn i am.. and u noe how devoted i am with fred.. so stop being so sacarstic or trying to put sumtyng to make me n fred have any conflicts..
u lost me and there is no way im goin back to you.. even if im not with fred.. i wont go to you...so get it in your head.. i wont love you ..
and it ends der..

thnx fer giving me all the attention that i need.. but i got sumhow, sick of it..
okok.. i tynk my words comes out sharp.. but u havta accept it..

so please, i tynk we shud stop here.. since fred never stop us frm contactin each other, i want us to stop...

SO I DUN WAN ANYMORE NONSENSE IN MY BLOG.THANK YOU.

tyngs are changing..

2007-03-06T07:54:00.000-08:00

yup2.. tyngs are changing.. like ppl in my course start to speak out the truth about sumone fer sum reason.. i thought i was the only one but then the truth came out.. well, i feel bad tho..

aniwae, to anyone..not one but anyone.. me n rockstar are perfectly fine! we have our ups and downs... but we are still loving each other..so dun tynk ur luck is up.. not just to guys.. even girls.. u all noe hu u all are..

i started back dancing.. it was gr8! haha.. tynk im sticking to it.. i mean i miss lush so much!! we had fun.. many tyngs i missed out.. news and also steps...hahaha..

....

2007-02-28T20:03:00.000-08:00

its the worst day of my life..
me n rockstar...

well..

dun ask

aniwae, rai was nice..
at least a guy hu doesnt add fuel to the fire..

rai told me to hold on..
he says

Kr.L-and we're going to p10 says:
well its abit hard uh but i think u shudnt break up

Kr.L-and we're going to p10 says:
i mean its not that bad

Kr.L-and we're going to p10 says:
but then again its up to u

爱 indonese nyonya_.【ツ】 says:
i dun want

爱 indonese nyonya_.【ツ】 says:
but he keeps on hurtin me

爱 indonese nyonya_.【ツ】 says:
i dunnop

爱 indonese nyonya_.【ツ】 says:
wat shud i say?

Kr.L-and we're going to p10 says:
thats where u haveta to ask urslef i believe

Kr.L-and we're going to p10 says:
if i mean u keep gettin hurt izzit so bad that u wud keep asking for breakups?

Kr.L-and we're going to p10 says:
if kecik keick i think u shdunt uh

Kr.L-and we're going to p10 says:
but if it sbad till u ALWAyS ask then yeah a break up is good but if u dun always ask fer it sekali sekala kind that dun uh i mean its part n parcel of relationship

so thnx rai..
i tynk u help me in doin sum tynking here..

thursday and friday

2007-02-26T01:56:00.000-08:00

thursday nyte

seven sundays

friday nyte

me n my gfs! love them to bits and pieces!!
celebrating nuhad's birthday at al-majlis.nuhad, wawa, me, haiyu
wen cabaretz turn ugly!! lol!
me n haiyu!

slacking at al-majlis
haha! i just hav an idea!
my booby gf..*chuckles*
=X

wawa n me

thursday

went to see seven sundays playing at the waterfront.. as usual.. they are damn awesome! and deir new song terbang is so so nice.. and they play US twice! haha

friday

went to meet my dearest gfs to celebrate nuhad's birthday.its fun coz all of us are der. but sadly,i have to go early.went to dblO den to mdm wong to sit n chill n listen to old sch music! haha!!) n momo(while waiting fer cash to flow so i cud go back,besides,i cant stand mdm wong! haha!) fer awhile. den went home.. as usual,rockstar is worried.. haiz.. cant he trust me??

after so long..

2007-02-20T09:25:00.000-08:00

i get to meet him!!

we went to bugis to eat tomyam that i was craving for since laz week! haha... den went to vivo and grab coffee.. n chocoloate ice blended... i dunno y i order dat... i actually wanted mocha..haha!

i miss lah seh!! haiyo!!

my dad bought a car

2007-02-18T22:46:00.000-08:00

yup... thats the tucson..

so aniwae, i just came back from port dickson..

b4 port dickson i went to negri sembilan..

balik kampuong~~ oooo~ balik kampung...

i mean duh! its new yr...

gong xi fa cai!

haha...

well, yeah..im rotting now at home..

hoping that rockstar can wake up real soon..

so we can go out...

haiz...

lets just see how..

if by 4pm he never call..

im goin to go and have a coffee by my own self..

sheesh.

i tynk i had enuf.. i tynk

2007-02-18T08:26:00.000-08:00

I dunno...

i went all the way there just to see you...

even for a while..

i cancel my outings with my family...

just to see you...

i took off day... just to see you...

to see you coz i miss you...i love you...

but i feel like im da only one am committing top dis r/s...

ive had it...

i noe u did sum tyngs...

but in the tymes of meeting each other..

u dont seem to bother...

i just went back from m'sia...but nuff said...

i dunno...

am i being an idiot??

and criuzly, to you guys..

yall noe hu u are..

stop cycoing me to break off with him and go to you...

I DUN NEED DAT.. SAVE DAT WORDS UP IN YOUR ASS!!

I ONLY LOVE MY ONE AND ONLY ROCKSTAR...

but is my love being appreciated?

fitness training pics

2007-02-13T19:40:00.000-08:00

wit addy,ct and aini in class
with shayfah
with my blazer and tie
when thinking skills bore me..
during the cross country..
with daniel ONG n anip bai
oh ya.. dats van with the shortest hair..
we do have bunch of 'gerek matreps' too..=D
oakleys.. with nazomi

with nisah otw to cross country

the gurls whom im close with in sch

nisa, ct, addy, aini, van, shayfah

after cross country..aini n shayfah
this is just half of the ppl whom i hang out togeder in sch!!
in fact, all FTs sit together..haha

the closest one

shayfah,nisa,aini

(sumhow it reminds me of ayu,wawa n nuhad..='( )

this LABU N LABI.. haha..naz n ahmad..

the closest guys

during breaktime at WM BK
NAZ ME SHAYFAH
in class.. haha!
in our gym.. yup2, OUR gym!! cool urh??!

wen we got our FT shirts..

but sumhow we weren't able to take a full length shot.-_-"

with kit and kat..
haha.. i gav dem dat name..
=D

ahmad n naz
KAK PAH!!!
with the cicak man.. NAZRI BAI..
with kak pah...heeheehee

all i can sae is.. my course RULES!!haha.. okok.. it sounds so lame.. but yeah.. i mean.. tho its in ITE, it doesnt really feels like ITE as we really use our minds alot to learn.. more like normal school just that we learn all about fitness... like anatomy, event organisation, health and safety,first aid and all.. well.. its not the end after all...=D here are sum pics we took so far...

chiang mai pics4

2007-02-04T02:01:00.000-08:00

chiang mai pic is up.. not in sequence tho.. thnx to zul oso fer sum of the pics..

its a great experience..=)

thnx to you guys fer da wonderful trip=)
da lucky gurl to be arnd the big boys..=D
night market is da best! shop till drop!
the city is soo beautiful in a not so modern way..
i dun look like erra fazira ok..
even da advertisement is so cute!
thnx to my ferragamo shoes.i walk like about ten mile without complain!
me n ida
we stole da uncles tuk tuk fer awhile!
i drive.. ok i dun..
at the silk factory..

chiang mai pics3

2007-02-04T00:54:00.000-08:00

at bosang on the first day..
its really sunny but cold!! really! very cold!
and i saw this cool vespa! so yeah... haha

this is the playground.. cute hor?
my sun is killing me wen i wanna take this pic..!
the water is really cold!!
the view from the boys room
random..haha!
this is just infront of my room
i love this pic so so much!

chiang mai pics2

2007-02-04T00:21:00.000-08:00

hahaha! its all thai channel seh..

the resort... nice hor??
im bored..so i took pics..
yup2... i took pics...

had our dinner after reaching at cm.. da place wher the coffee got lotsa cockroaches!
our lunch(first day) dat cost 150 baht.. nice tomyam but not spicy..

otw to chiang mai..

chiang mai pics1

2007-02-04T00:04:00.000-08:00

kak ct send me to the airport..thnx sis!
this is the laz nyte in chiang mai.. i got two roses=) thnx=)
was chilling at starbucks after shopping with zul n his fwens..
the last sunrise we see at cm b4 heading to the airport..sobz
2nd day at bosang umbrella fair.. i tynk.. haha.. bought one umbrella fer da sun.. tho its cold..

im going chiang mai

2007-01-18T13:25:00.000-08:00

didnt get to update my blog just now at home...

actually wanted to update abt my sch..

btw, me and rockstar are ok now...
as usual, we put the probs behind us..

oh ya abt my sch...
haha... i just love to talk abt it!!
coz schs super gerek..!!
haha...=)
was battling dance with this minah from office skills..
and she can only poof out her boobs...
haha..
but i still won in da end..
den captains ball was gerek...
coz we won!!
hahahaa... duh! fitness students rule!!
okok.. i betta stop..=D
aniwae, everyone will never expect wat cca i took...
haha...n no no its not dance...
its SOCCER...
yeah..
heeee~~~
so many pics i took in sch..
will put the pics up wen i reached s'pore...

yup2... im goin chiang mai...
with my fren..
so yeah...
will put dat pics up also soon i guess...

well, dats all fer now..
coz im now at the airport using this free internet access and my legs are killin me coz i havta stand to use this comp..lol!!

haha...

and rockstar,i miss you=)

saturday - =) sunday - =S

2007-01-14T03:59:00.000-08:00

yesterdae..
so yeah... its tapa's bdae...
was working on dat day and syam msg me saying about goin to KTV to celebrate tapa's bdae..
wanted to go but didnt have any cash with me...
but syam insist on me goin...
and since i havent been seeing LUSH for a very long tyme..
so i went=) i mean tapa's my fren for more den 10 years..

so was at work and i got my own shop key...
i felt so honoured to be given dat key sumhow..haha
and i noe dat we can use b.o.w clothes at work... haha..
gerek...
im loving my job! haha

so met up wit a friend first at my workplace..
was so nervous as its my first time closing da shop alone..
haha!
oh ya...
i got an adidas jacket n pants=)=)=)
hahaha...
so happy lorrrr...

den went to meet all the other LUSHIANS...
not all was der...
i mean da ones dats not der is the chinese girls,elly,filz n vega...
was fun...
we had this karaoke competition and maz got first.. followed by amsyar..
and i came third! haha.. funny!!
den we gila2... damn i miss lush..
i think im gonna start to go to deir practice oredy..
im lackin behind...!!

den rockstar was worried as usual...
he doesnt trust me at all..
i mean, its not like im having sex or dating sumone...
its just having fun with friends..
and with him feeling this way, i feel restricted and guilty..
tho i did nutyng...
*sigh*
he just doesnt understand and accept my social life...

oh ya... todae abg li's engagement..
haha..
at last he is gettin married!!
aniwae, was goin thru mails in the morning and i found lawyer letter regardin my bill...
i was so shock..coz i noe i did transfer my mom money to pay for my bill..
and i found out she hadnt been paying but spendin...
she have this power wher she knew my weakness..
she will ask fer money and make me feel guilty if i never giv her...
and im talking about more than 60% den wat i can giv..
i mean my own drops of sweat juz gon wat? let her spend it like dat???
i was so pissed... and dey say im being selfish n greedy with money..

i dun mind giving or borrowing ppl money but the least dey cud do is be honest...
and i will if i can afford to..
i mean i work to earn the money..
so i can buy the stuff dat i need and want...
like handphone..
till now i havent bought the handphone!
and i needed to share it with sumone...
so hu else can i turn to...
my tears fell wen i saw rockstar msg..
i cant believe he is really msging me dat...
i mean isnt he suppose to be my angel?
but why is he so rude?and mean?
its my parents for gods sake!
i mean im his girlfriend..
if he wanna impress me, if i really mean so much to him,
he shud be nice to my parents...
im the one dats feeling all the pain,
but i never hate my own parents...
i still respect dem...
i cant take it anymore already..
it isnt the first time..
and its humiliating wen his family members noes abt my family..
about how 'bad' my parents is... and how 'good' oder parents is...
i dun care! dey are still da coolest parents to me!!
so i cant just not back up my own flesh n blood for one jerk!
so i told him to fuck himself!

gawsh! i miss him already!
but i cant believe he would be that mean...

its a shame how u think that im caught up under ur spell

the first week in ite bb n clementi

2007-01-12T04:46:00.000-08:00

so sch was definitely great...
i feel like sum popstar when ppl keep on saying "ecar ryte?"
or "hello ecar"
haha!
okok... im not boasting... im just simply bloggin..

so yeah... my hang out frends are shayfah, anip, ahmad, nas, mirul... (mostly are with dem)

dey gerek to da max...
if u sit with dem can not just pecah perut.. but pecah tekak!!
dey really sick and funny seh!!

and okok.. i admit.. anip, nas and ahmad are cute guys...
so no doubt minahs at ite clement will keep on lookin at dem..
tho dey are attach..
and da boys juz love to kacau2 all this gurls so dat da gurls will tynk dey are pretty...
i mean in another words, the boys are juz playing arnd with their feelings...
sumhow... haha.. but its funny tho..
coz i getta see all this girls reaction wen the boys approach dem..
how dey show off their boobs and make it looks like its popping out of their body any moment..
haha..

okok...
i gotta bounce...(gawsh! wher do i get dat line frm?!)

gotta work tom...

toodles!

first day in ite

2007-01-08T05:36:00.000-08:00

i went to ite bb and found out i havta go to ite clementi !!
so im like an idiot goin here n der...
so now i noe my course is at both ite bb and clementi..
haha...

so yeah..
saw ppl dat i noe...
and i have new friends..
but i miss wawa, haiyu and nuhad..
its like we cum in a set..
so now im alone..
haha...

but my class are fun tho..
nono.. not class... but the course..
the people dat i sit with...

okok... i tynk i remember deir name...

i remember shayfah..(da first one i approach), siti, anip(gah! he kill me in a funny way!haha), ahmad, naz, amirul.. urmm... den i tynk ders bai n zul.. i dunno! haha...

the new job n new sch

2007-01-07T07:52:00.000-08:00

tomorrow is my first day in sch!
haha...
new sch...
new classmates..
new rules..
i feel like im starting all over again...
haha...

oh ya..
my new job..
dat my mom doeant noe of?
yup2...
its gr8=)
feels like a family..
i mean the shop is a family-cum-boyfren business..
so this two, my boss, shulin n brian..
are bf-gf... and dey open the business together..
cute rytE??
haha..
and shulin's fam members also help out...
and im workin der..
i'm part of the fam=)
i feel appreciatesd der..
the clothes are nice n cheap..
i mean.. wen i work ferragamo..
i go crazy with branded...
yes2.. gotta stop dis...
hahaha...

and i get to play with cash register!
haha...

chingay is good...

so yup2...
lets see if tomorrow in my new sch turns out good..
like cute guys to look at...
or gr8 lessons...

haiz...
i miss hillgrove..

p.s
gurls if you are into vintage or junky wearing.. or interested in handbags or bags that are unique or a look-alike to chloe or miumiu, cum down to B.O.W at level 4 far east plaza=) yes2.. i'm working der.. help me to help you=) spread the words around yall....

my new original blogskin

2007-01-04T12:48:00.000-08:00

this is my new blogskin...

yeah... made it myself=)

so wat do u tynk?

JUDE LAW !!

2007-01-04T07:28:00.000-08:00

I just love english men with a killer smile.

Like JUDE LAW!

omg! im in love!AGAIN!

But you know i love my rockstar more=)

he msg me??

2007-01-02T09:10:00.000-08:00

he msg me todae..
with a different number..
hmm..
strange but sweet tho..
i mean he's not as mean as i think he is..

its just really2 sad..
coz everytyme wen we chill around..
he'll also be there..
so now its like its either me n not him der..
or him n not me der..
sad ryte?

i wonder wats the cause of this?
is it the past feelings?
but its the past..
its long gone..
we both moved on and got better..

so y are we still cold with each other?

its a big mistake that i make..
havent i say sorry?

haha! okok.. dats copyright! but dat part only..
i wish u really were saying dat to me..
okok.. we both say dat to each other...
i mean, lose a friend?
sheesh..

i dun like to lose friends that makes me smile when im down..
and dat gets on my nerves..
and der to fill my time with his crappiness..

well, yeah..
just come to think about it..
he's a sweet friend to msg me to wish well for my granny..
and msg my sis to ask if im ok after the accident..

he's ,in fact, a nice friend after all..

happy 2007

2006-12-31T08:03:00.000-08:00

here i am with my baby wawa..
on new years day ..
infront of the computer..
oh yah..
happy new year..
i slept..
and woke up by the sound of my hp..
rockstar msg me..
oh yah..
never countdown with him..
again
the parents are asleep..
no we dun countdown together..
and yes..
im not outside..
my granny in hospital..
and yes..
dats da first time i see her lie down der..
i hope fer 2007, everytyng will turn out well for me..
with the new sch..
i pray everyone around me will be safe..
my house will be more peaceful..
me n rockstar will still be together..

and me, will still be me..
only older and wiser=)

happy 2007 everyone..

cheerz!

my granny's sick

2006-12-29T08:52:00.000-08:00

i hope my granny will be ok
im praying for you
i know you are strong

i love you nenek

happy happy day

2006-12-27T23:52:00.000-08:00

todae is like happy happy day..
i feel like singing the happy happy song! lol!
okok.. u guys probably dun noe how the song goes...
u gotta watch nickelodeon more!!
ok i stop!

haha..

went to interview at ite bb fer my fitness training interview..
it was all good..=)
i manage to impress dem=)
so havta wait till saturday to know my results..
argh! im really relying on this one..
its my second choice..
after which i cant get to apply nafa..-_-"
okok.. look forward!haha
i was like tynking"is dis da sch dat i wanna go?"

just as i enter the sch..
suddenly the birds chirping and the waterfall sound is like so peaceful...
wtf?! but really! i was like omg! its like as if im in a movie! hahahah!!!
but then its ok i guess=)

just as i finish my interview,
i got a msg from shu min (if im not mistaken dats her name)
yup2.. shes like the urmm..the owner(i guess) for the clothes b.o.w i tynk..
-w-.. aniwae, she msg me saying dat i got the job!
yayness!!!

toldya its a happy day...

and btw, im gonna go gym layta with ungklak n tiger. i mean really! im goin to the gym!! hahaha... okok.. i dunno wat to wear actually.. they told me to bring shin pads..-_-""

"sing a happy happy sooooonnggg~~~"

sheeshaa pic 3

2006-12-27T10:29:00.000-08:00

richard edit this and say "tiger have spots??"
LOL!!
and i edit this.. yes richard.. you're welcome..=D
haha.. all of us actually plan to go up..
but me n tiger stay der instead..
and yes2.. dey all werk fer me.. LoL!

sheeshaa pic 2

2006-12-27T09:49:00.000-08:00

when raihan is posing like hulkok its dark.. so we try again..
and its still dark...4get it.-_-"
i sumhow like this pic..
the sheeshaaholicsss
especially with this three belos.. everyone's high
lagy2 this ungklak! lol!
wen we juz wanna try to be like the japanese gurls.. well..

the sheeshaa pic 1

2006-12-27T09:19:00.000-08:00

yes2.. my cabaret wawa and zilah..=)
the virgin forever? my tshirt sucks! lol!
okok.. criuzly..the ungklak is really high..
sheeshaa is love~~
my face stoppit ekh!!eeeuuuww!!

my rockstar turns 24

2006-12-26T08:42:00.000-08:00

HAPPY 24TH BIRTHDAY ROCKSTAR!!!!

jude law is so cute!!

2006-12-25T09:02:00.000-08:00

i m so having a huge crush on jude law!!
wen we were watching holiday i mean me n rockstar..
den wen i saw jude law..
i was blushing all the way..
like as if he was looking at me..
even tho its obvious dat he's looking at cameron diaz!
haha..i keep on telling rockstar till he got sick of it..haha

gah!i miss my rockstar! i mean how can u stand to be with a guy hu is damn farking irritating, childish at times.. but he wont admit it, egoistic bastard, bossy but all lovely at the same tyme?
i made it thru with him fer like abt 1 year and 4 months?? =D

even wen we are not together..
we alwaez were der fer each oder..
still saying dat we miss one anoder..
dat we love one anoder..
bah!
even wen ders third party!
gah! i remember diamond!
okok..i stop!=x

well, basically juz wen back frm my granny house..yup2..
its xmas (merry xmas ppl!!)
and also my grands anniversary..
laz two days wen to sleep at mak's house..coz nex day goin to east coast..
east coast was uber fun coz its raining..
so we play games inda rain..
and at last ders still prizes left so dey giv it away by giving us to ans like "seerti untuk kocek per" and all..
and im bad in malay..so yeah..
the prizes are all funny tho..
from tray, organisers, to toilet bowl brushes! lol!
den slept at my cousin's house and now im home..=)

oh ya.. i put up a slideshow.. take ur time and look at it=)
i mean if its too fast u can just click on it, den it stops..
hu noes..if ur lucky u might fid ur face in it=)

fer the past daes

2006-12-22T23:48:00.000-08:00

well...as u all noe dat im not gonna go sec 5..
not that i hate studies and school and all..
fer me its a waste if i go fer one more year in school when i noe i cant get the expected points fer o levels..
i mean.. my science.. my malay.. my FnN...
jyeah..

so aniwae, yall noe also dat i am really DYING to go to NAFA..
but then my parents say arts cant make it..
i was so shattered..
really..no kidding..
i was near tears when my parents say dat..
i mean dey were always der behind me in watever i do..
dey alwaez support me..
im shocked to hear wat dey were saying..
was telling bighead how sad i was..
while typing my tears stream down by itself..
but i kept cool...
hoping my parents wont notice my tears..
so yeah..dey dun..=)
dey ask me to go ITE to take fitness training..
i love da course..
but i just dun really like the idea..
i mean the reason im studying is i want to go to arts scene..

dats da reason why im still in sch..
even tho i retain,
i still hold on...

haiz..

so aniway..dat day went out to sheeshaa again with the usual sheeshaa buddies..
the tiger and ungklak..nono..now cobbler..
tho i still tynk ungklak is best name fer him...
LoL!
also with wawa, zilah and also faris..
was fun coz after dat we camwhore2...
everyone got so lazy dat we lie down and like just talk crap..
abt pregnancy and all!
LoL!!

and yesterdae i went out with tiger, ungklak, bighead, akeem, naufal, urmm.. dis guy who was with naufal..(sorry gawsh wats da name?) imran, (this guy with the blue cap) and.. urmm.. did i missed out sumone??haha
but b4 dat i went to sch to pay up sch fees..
and saw wawa and haiyu..
dey went to sec 5..
im happy fer dem..
den i feel lost..
like shud i go?
i mean its worthless feeling fer me oredy..
i dunno wat to do...
watever it is..i hope our friendship last forever=)
so i and wawa chill at coffee bean..
b4 meeting ungklak at yck..
and yerp.. im da early bird..
more like da earliest bird!LoL!

so went yp and hear imran's story of his embarassing life..
haha.. farni.. ended up laughing..
tho its kinda awkward coz didnt noe moz of dem and im da onli gurl -_-"
den sum left while others went to lucky p to play pool..
didnt hav tyme fer me to play as i gotta meet rockstar..
we watching midnyte..
so we watch the holidays..
saw Laney tho..
wanna say hi but she is busy taking pictures with her mates..haha
den at BK saw her again.. den like scary coz her fwens the crazy2 type..
den i like takot.. hahha.. wtf..
yerp2...dats all..
if i got the pics from wawa, i'll put it up=)

i pass my n level! yay me!

2006-12-18T09:31:00.001-08:00

i pass my n levels!!
yay to me!!!!
haha..
okok...
but i aint goin sec 5..
i mean i noe where i stand..
5 subjects to pass my o levels..
i noe i cant...
and its not about trying or giving up..
its about reality..

dun worry..
i got oder plans made=)

so after dat i spend da tyme with family..
went to changi to juz chill but den the rain cums..
haha..

aniwae, im now listening to lily allen..
gawsh! her songs are so damn nice!
but i aint changin my blog songs coz this song is my ultimate favourite..=)

and thnx to rockstar fer dat..=)

speaking bout him..
im soo sooo SOOO missing him ryte now!!

i really need him here with me..
i want him to cuddle me to sleep..
den giv me a kiss on my forehead..
and hug me tight...
=(

2006-12-17T10:40:00.000-08:00

while waiting fer the family to come home

2006-12-17T09:59:00.000-08:00

well.. been three days my family all went to KL.. so its like just me left here.. well.. wanna update abit.. dat day went to balcony with the colleagues after work.. den da nex dae i went to sheesha with gfs.. but not all gfs are der.. its a must to have wawa! lols! and isma and shazzy.. i wanna go shop fer clothes.. i've been eyeing and targeting goods dat are above 200 plus.. like dat tote bag by yves saint lauren! or dat shades from dior! or dat bag from loewe! argh! even wallet from ferragamo! so i gotta stop. go bugis and buy stuffs dat are nice but cheap at the same tyme. so i manage to buy two tops one jeans and one belt at an amazing price of below 100 dollars! woah! head to arab st as i promise the gfs im treating them sheesha.. den we join with raihan and his fwens as we dunno wher to go and its full at the 2nd level.. i mean cant believe sat nyte arab st isnt as lively like how it used to be!! where all these ppl go?? haha..

i miss my gfs so much! its a pity haiyu n nuhad not der.. =( but we had fun..

den da next day went to see rifqy.. dat kid grew darn big!! and intelligent too!! i sumhow miss my babywawa.. so gav him his shoes(i bought him a ferragamo shoes) so yeah..

it was fun.. but i miss my family.. so much..

and now im all alone at home..
i miss dem more...haiz...

and da best part is..

the house seems empty without rockstar too..

i miss him..=( badly...

i wonder wat my family bought fer me...

i'll put the pics up wen i gottit from wawa.=)

2006-12-15T20:17:00.000-08:00

look at my wawa! all grown up!
even rockstar junior grown! he's so chubbylicious!!
yup2!! sop much!!
and i love this pic.. sumhow he looks cute in dis pic
at jawatimur on our one year..
at homeclub..

pics dat i just got

2006-12-15T19:59:00.001-08:00

saw dat necklace? i lost dat! ='(colleagues.. yuying and firdaus
at balcony.. in da nyte of my payday!
i want my teeth back!!!
the branded 'seow' girls..lol!

pics dat i just got

2006-12-15T19:59:00.000-08:00

baby im back!

2006-12-11T17:58:00.000-08:00

yes2..got my connection back..phew!

tot im gonna lose it forever..lol!!

oh ya..

todays my off day..

yup2..

tyngs been goin ok for me..

i mean the ok is more like oooouuhhh kayyy...

coz werks like hell as tyme goes by..

yeah.. but well, dats life..

and my lips are now swollen..

gawsh! isnt it enuff!

one after anoder!

bah!

hope its gonna recover soon...

coz i look like the grinch..

but of coz the female n cuter version..=D

puhleeze!

oh ya.. gonna change my hair soon!!!

cant wait!!

i mean im tired of my hair...haha..

and me n rockstar been goin well..

gawsh i love him so much!!!

haha..

he's so nice..

suddenly wen m world fall apart,

he is der to hold me..

surprisingly..

i tot he's gonna be like how he use to be..

but no..

hes different...

he was der..

and his words.. wen he msg..

gah!

its like we just fall in love with each other...

=)=)

im happy dat i got you..=)

and to all taggers...

thnx fer da tagss..=)

you guys are da best!

i mean w/o you..

i dun tynk i will still keep my blog...=D

cheerios

more prom pics

2006-11-24T08:55:00.000-08:00

yes2!!i will never ever forget my cabaretz!
he's cute n hes single...any takers?
this side is wher my scars cant be seen..haha
thats why i olwaez face dat way
haha.. my chin so long!!

2006-11-24T08:39:00.000-08:00

I miss you terribly
You're fading in this dream
Now I can't hear you speak
Just listen to myself scream
I'm alone in this memory

No sight of you right beside me
I shed my tears to sleep
Our promises I can't keep
My heart lost a piece
I got to live with this
I beg & bleed for you to stay
I pray that you won't walk away
I will be waiting
Until the day we meet again
My feelings won't change a think
Losing you is hard to gain

I wish time will flow fast
I want to make this last
I want the past
I want to see that smile
That we've left behind
But I can't just ask
I love you
But I got to let you go
But my heart says 'No'
I'll come back to you
Back into your arms
But just not now

my sister wrote and sing this song with her playing with the guitar the oder day n i cry...

2006-11-23T05:56:00.000-08:00

love our tetrina!!
4a3 rox!!
nuhad haiyu wawa me n nana
vega me(cant see my leave!=D) dee

da performerz n the mc fer da nyte.
the ladies in my class

2006-11-23T05:46:00.000-08:00

prom nyte

2006-11-23T04:47:00.000-08:00

its monday and me n my family..(the p-4) went out to vivo..
to buy my prom dress..
yes2!! its soon! haha..
my moms over excited...
more excited den me tho ...haha..
she dreamt 3 person wore the same dress as me..
so i bought one green dress(fyi, this is my first ever dress..)
and one shades to cover my ugliness..
its big..it covers half of my face..
dats why i buy..haha

den tuesday.. start work..
everyone...even my 'stepmom'(manager =D) lecture me...
haha...
den wen to continue shop for prom while catching up with an old friend..
so went to wisma to find my tube (which i found three for a price of 16.90 afetr discount at ebase)..
still tynk i shud buy the panties too..
so der goes my pay... bah!
oh ya.. met aza..
the partner in accident =D
he's ok.. just his arm..
and emoranger..*jeng jeng jeng*
yeah2...
inda morning i just got the feeling i will see him inda mrt..
but then i met him at wisma after werk..
well, it looks like he hates me...
i dunno..
-w-.. didnt see him holding his mobile tho... =D

den wednesday..off day and prom nyte!!!
yeah.. was the emcee..
but b4 dat i went to meet my lawyer..
den to rockstar house..
he was so sweet!!
after we parted he say "walk with pride sayang..u'll ALWAYZ be my eye candy" n i save dat msg!! haha..
den to doctor appointment..
den to prom nyte..
yeah.. it was boring but dancing was fun tho it could be much better...
lush shud actually do more with the help of the crowd..
and yeah...i miss 4a3!!
i saw the slide show n i cried.. n tetrina cried too!!
im gonna sooo miss dem..
okok... beautiful babes dat i saw is wawa,iqlima,dat prom queen tho its outta theme(wth, everyone is outta theme!!),and dat 'ayu' ..dats wat dey call her.. shes ricardo's cousin lah.. and oh ya.. dat roy's ex too and jie hui.. yeah..
the hot hunks i saw is faruq(he does look hot!) and urm.. well, i juz tynk he's the one dats cute dat nyte.. oh ya and dat 4a1 chn guy.. dat annoying one..i dunno his name..hahha..
oh2.. look at the pics...
i'll put em up wen i got all of em=)
i dun look like im goin for prom!
and i miss my minahs of 2nd batch...!!!

bored bored bored

2006-11-19T19:08:00.000-08:00

being at home kills me..

when im werking im dying to be home..

now when im home im dying to go out..
haha..

okok.. im missing rockstar badly..=( n he noes i miss him..n everytyme i saes dat he will have this evil smile in his mind wit him sayin "padan muka" ... blueks~~~~~

gonna remove my stitches today n hope ders no extended mc for me coz i really wanna go back to work.. heex.. n after dat im heading tangs den vivo to buy my prom stuff..

my payday...i cant do my hair as i gotta save money to do my teeth..bah! hate it! i was really looking forward to do my hair.. bah! n proms cuming n i look like shyte!

wtf.. n da best part is im the mc.. n the mc gotta look good..
bah!

aaaaaaaahhhhhhhhh!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

not pissed but hurt

2006-11-17T21:26:00.000-08:00

really, i dun see the wrong of goin to work with a colleague on a motorbike..
okok.. but mebbe now i noe..
n okok.. i admit.. i shouldnt go arnd anoder mans motorbike.. tho i still tynk the rule abt "if u hav a man, u shudnt ride anoder mans motor" is crappy...

and i got wat i deserve.. i met with an accident.. i lost my tooth i lost my smile.. my face.. and u already scold me.. my mom.. my granny.. u guys nag oredy..

but why must u keep on bragging abt it? im not mad.. im not pissed.. but hurt.. yes! im hurt! n must i tell u? even if i do,would u care? im hurt coz im giving enuf trouble for my mom.. my parents.. n you.. i dun wan anyone to worry abt me..

n im ugly.. very ugly! my babywawa didnt even dare to come near me.. i wasnt even in her birthday picture.. i dunno.. i hate it..

but all this.. still not enuff?? still want me to feel bad?? till wen will u stop? till i beg down on my knees and cry infront of you? or if im DEAD?!

i dunno wat im crappin.. i just feel like typing sumtyng!

but i dunno.. the first tyng dat came in my mind was you.. i called you first.. you were der.. buying fer me food wen im hungry.. i just wish you could learn how to control ur temper... it hurts to see you msging me dat way...

tha day i met with an accident

2006-11-16T02:45:00.000-08:00

my bitching partner n guybestiethnx ritz fer being der=)

I just went back from n.u.h(hospital) as i met with an accident.

was on my way to work with my colleague n yup2.. it just happen..

its so fast n unexpected..

i never thought i could get that and yeah..it happens to me..

the saddest part is i chipped my two front tooth n my face is all being scrapped off..

im ok..im fine..

without anyone knowing, im traumatised abt how i look right now..

i dun dare to even look in the mirror now.. even in the toilet..

the first time i see it in the hospital..

i ended up crying all night long..

maybe its crappy but tynk about it..

my smile.. my face..='(

but thanx to my family n friends n especially rockstar..

who is really der..

n make me smile..

wawa,haiyu,nuhad,noi,imah,noi's sis, ritz,khai,Is botak,my parents,my sis,my kuzz,my aunt, my granny n rockstar(mcm grammy awards plak..=D)

im ugly..still love me?

i told my manager im starting work nex week..

hate being at home..its damn bored...

but Alhamdulillah,thank God that im still alive..

come to tynk, if im dead...

okok..i better stop..

but seriuosly, one moment.. just by a second.. your life can be turned upside down..

n it will change forever..

work

2006-11-12T11:21:00.000-08:00

okok.. been damn sooo long i havent update..

coz im rarely home..its been work n work n work for me.. but work is fun tho.. discover new tyngs in life.. never knew earning money is goin to be this tough.. n seeing all this rich asses that have low personality.. ugh! my advice is never to work! haha.. but criuzly fun.. the makcik2 kpo der gerek banget!

so yeah.. i keep on goin outta da house early inda morn at 7am n came back the nex morn at arnd 3am? or 4am? i dunno... its so tired! n i miz my sister.. n my family.. weird..but yeah.. i miss them all...

so tomorrow gonna work pm shift.. yerp2.. transfer back to paragon.. haha.. n sales starts.. bah! i tynk i need da sleep..!! haha..

ohya, my sis one day msg me "i miss you".. i was so touch.. it suddenly made my whole day.. haha.. i miss her.. i love her.. n im sad that she's beginning to grow.. coz wen we grow.. we tend to be curious n explore.. i dun wan my sis to be like me... yeah..

i better sleep..

2006-11-02T16:59:00.000-08:00

lemme get this straight..
im in love with rockstar...
ok?
ROCKSTAR..

dis blog is obviously abt him..*duh*

aniwae... nuff bout him for the moment..
so yeah .. to u noe hu u r.. dats not rockstar.. i've read the tagboard.. but its not him hu tag.. im not covering for him.. i noe him so well.. he aint dat childish to write dat.. n the way R put the words are so not rockstar..ok?

went to vivo the oder dae...blablablabalablablaablablaaaaaa
mebbe a lil respect fer da lady could be nice..

gonna start my work todae... so yeah.. so tired at warehouse yesterday.. was busy busy n my senior supervisor just gav me a very important task.. kinda feel dat the trust is der..good job ecar =) so i've been transfered to taka.. n not paragon.. the only new part timer der.. gah! if can i want paragon..coz its big n nicer...hahaha..

okok..yesterday was a suckiest day too.. i woke up with a msg dat says "FUCK" n all.. criuzly in da morning...-_- .. n rockstar aint nice too.. dey both couldnt stop urh? me n u-noe-hu are nutyng AT ALL ... n u both are fighting like as if i own both..doinks! its juz sick wen two of you talk abt each oder n im da middle person.. kinda pressurising.. but then again..like u care.. all u care abt is urself and wat u guys want.. pfft..guys..i've had it..

so i tynk i just be under rockstar arms now.. coz he's the only one that makes the effort to make me smile.. oh ya... go check the pics he put! ders me on it! =D

love my baby rockstar...muackz muacks...

the day i went vivo with rockstar

2006-10-30T21:35:00.000-08:00

yesterdae i went to vivo with rockstar..
coz he havent been to vivo..

aniwae,

i dun tynk its me. but i juz wanna noe, why are u still goin thru my profile n his?

i dunno.. but i miss you.. i mean not having a person to accompany your day n night.. haha.. talk crap.. well, -w- ... mebbe i shud look on the bright side.. at least i dun havta top my my pre daily.. lol! well, yeah.. its not abt loosing sumone special.. its about loosing a friend.. dats der to listen.. yeah.. i dun want more den dat.. but i dunno.. wtf m i talking abt aniwae.. gah!

so yeah..todae stay at home..tomorrow gonna be work again for me..im super dupery lazyyyy....
and im bored...so damn bored..
and im sad... but wth, me n my sadness..like as if ppl giv a damn abt it.. dey expect me to smile all the time...so yeah.. juz smile=)=)=)=)

=)

bah! boredboredboredbored... n dat sumone actually got say sumtyng abt going vivo on this week.. but since we are no more 'contacting'...(.....) =D no worries..=) i wont forget you crazy fella=) uve been a nice fren=)

cheerios!

raya pics

2006-10-29T21:46:00.001-08:00

this is when im da one who is ready for the camera
this is the wacky pose we all did ..haha
wan,aidil,qisha,ritz,nyonya,khai

bella,yanti,syq,wani

the girls. most of us wear purple/maroon! haha
the guys.. haha.. whers ritz?

okok... this is sum of the pics that are up..adios

raya pics

2006-10-29T21:46:00.000-08:00

hari raya with myspacers 1

2006-10-29T20:17:00.000-08:00

on sat wen to vivo with khai, eddie, sis, saosin, umar, n fifi..

yeah.. umar n fifi came down at nyte..

it was so gerek coz the 3 boys talk crap all nyte long at roof..hahaha

den on sun went to jln raya.. coz ritz open his house..lol!! wtf m i saying?

with khaidamnit(khai lar), asswhyqueue(sis), nabella nutella(bella), vintage glam(yanti), elqtro_?_(qisha..lol!), funky donutZ(my RITZ!!), fcuk(wan), aidilshah(as himself), rose, khalid, wani (i tynk her nick is pink sumtyng2)..

so basically out of all i only noe 7 of dem but we mix arnd n we had fun.. tho i havta miss two houses coz havta teman ritz go back to take his army clothes..n guez who i met with wen i came to back to his house..eka!! yes! haha.. but mummy noes dat me n ritz are frens.. gawsh.. me n him a couple? no way.. so i got this stares frm eka n her mom..wtf..like i care..

so thnx guys.. u guys fill up my day=) n bella.. i nk da pics.. so can put here!! haha.. we so giler seh.. inda bus mcm org giler nyanyi2..haha.. i dun mind hanging out with dem again..mebbe nex sat ader lagy... hahaha.. dumdimdumdidum...

n to u whom it may concern, i dunno wat u want but i tynk the blog isnt abt me.

well, i hate it wen this happens! farkit! criuzly i dunno but i feel crappy n he can just watch me cry der alone. nice friend. blabalbalbala

no mood sia to talk bout all this.. i dun tynk im gonna write it here.. like duh, he's reading it. so yeah.. juz gonna talk bout my day n dats it..

so dun havta block me.. n if u wanna msg me juz msg lah.. dun havta say dun reply back..

doinkssssss

izeet the end of me n rockstar?

2006-10-26T11:01:00.000-07:00

[Chorus]
Ride when we ride we ride
It's til the day we die
When we ride we ride
It's til the day we die

[Verse 1]
It's real late
Bout a quater to 1
Thinkin' about everything that we've become
And I hate it
I thought we could make it
But I'm ready to scratch this
Just wanna forget about it
I saw the pictures
And the letters she sent
You had me thinkin' you were out with your friends
I'm so foolish
Played me like I'm stupid Cuz I thought it was just you and I (oh)

[Hook]That's how I think after all the time
We spent in love
I see it in my mind
Playing over and over again
It's far and out
You got me breaking down
And I just can't figure out why
But this is what you say

[Chorus x2]

[Verse 2]
Visions in my mind
Of the day that we met
You showed me things
That I'll never forget
Took me swimming
In the ocean
You had my head up in the clouds
Make me feel like im floating (yeah)
You think I'm playing
When you know it's the truth
Nobody else can do it
Quite like I do
All my kisses
And my lovin
But ain't nobody
Better than us

[Hook]

[Chorus x2]

[Verse 3]
I guess it's over
And definitely
But you and I know
It's not that easy
To let go Of everything (everything)
And start all over again
Just bring this up cuz you blew it
I wont forget how you do it
Sweet baby
This is where the game ends now somehow
Might not believe you and me
We can figure it out

[Chorus]

You finna make me say boy
I wish that you could come hold me
When I'm lonely
When I need someone to talk to
You would phone me
Just like everything it's on me(when we ride we ride it's til the day we die)
Boy you forgot about the promises
You made me
And now we'll let the memories
Just fade away
But I remember
What you used to say(when we ride we ride it's til the day we die)
[Chorus x2]

n here our story ends..
n i know i havta look forward..

whats next?

i dun tynk i deserve to be called a CUNT by a rockstar.. yes! rockstar!
******************************
n i dunno wat u want.. me? or u juz wan to let out ur feelings ONLY? pls.. u make me feel guilty.. u let me stay outside da door while u are inside tynking weder to let me in onot..

club youth fest

2006-10-26T10:40:00.000-07:00

Are you ready for the most talked about event in town? Yes! It is ClubYouthFest 2006. Mixing awareness with music and performances.

Here is where your $18 going:
1) Cancer awareness
2) More than 3 hours of music, dance and more
3) Help to fundraise for Assisi Home & Hospice
4) Club all you want with a cause

With only $18, you get solid performances by:
- LA Dance Connection
- Paradox
- Sensually Transmitted Music
- Krashed Lines
- Yee Bah
- EMP from Republic Polytechnic
- Steven Lim
- Derek Heng
- DanceFusion
- Jeremy Ng

With so many performances, do your part in helping to fundraise for Assisi Home & Hospice! Get your presales tickets now from Serene now!
For further enquires, please contact Serene @ eneres.yeo@gmail.com

i hate guys

2006-10-25T07:03:00.000-07:00

i hate guys

i hate mens

aiya! i hate male species!

='(

i tynk fred loves shay

2006-10-24T21:11:00.000-07:00

Aniway, todae story is about rockstar...

bah! haha... i sound so mother goose!

oh yeah.. raya was fun.. tho i didnt get packets much coz dey tot im working..

im still waiting for results!! im still young n cute!! haha

oh yeah..rockstar..hmm..urmm..

ya..
i dunno..
i just feel u dunno wat u really want..
u sure u want me?
u do selfish tyngs i hate n expect me to understand..
and my doings dat u hate are more reasonable and u wont wanna understand..

wat u want?

please.. dun do this to me.........

slamat hari raya

2006-10-23T11:50:00.000-07:00

so yeah..
its been long i updated my blog..
my bdae also da lpas..
wtf..

so yar..
today is hari raya..
so, slamat hari raya to all muslims all around the worlds that's reading this blog!
haha

oh ya.. my bdae this yr was abit diff.. meaningful.. i hav tons of frens hu remembered my bdae..=) the one i cant forget is the treat i got frm (not gonna say the nick coz sumone will keep questioning me) [u noe hu u r ayte?*winks]..the necklace frm faruq..its so sweet!! n mp4 frm rockstar..yeah.. it was unbelievable.. also i went homeclub to watch seven sundays, my writes and one more band perform.. so yeah..all three of them are good.. i had fun..

i fought for a while with him.. and we nearly break our friendship.. but we are ok..=)

its funny wen one tyme i feel u are hinting on me but the other tyme i tynk ur hinting to oder person..

watever..i dunno.. its juz so confusing to noe..

i tot guys make move..not gurls..wtf

i keep on smiling wen i tynk of you,

watever we use to do together,

becums a cure to my sadness n sorrow,

ur voice becums my lullaby,

ur smile still stuck inside my mind,

im not sure if we can still be this way,

but i dun wan u to go,

i wan u to stay,

but everytyme i step forward,

ders alwaez sumtyng dats inda way...

n sumtymes i hope dat feeling will go away...

please tell me wat u really want,

coz i hate hanging and keep on guessing..

2 more daes 2 sweet 17

2006-10-16T10:22:00.000-07:00

2 more daes to sweet 17

as i start to fall deeper..
tyngs go wrong from what i see..
again u are being cold..
n i dunno why..

haiz..

i cant wait for work tomorrow tho im lazy to go.. been resting my ass at hme for too long .. im still in my bumming mode..haha..
blablabla
im bored..
yeah..very...
coz sumone juz dun talk dat much to me todae..

misunderstood

2006-10-16T08:37:00.000-07:00

so yeah.. just wen tyngs went well.. it seems like its not..

i sense sumtyngs wrong again..

bah!
if der is sumtyngs wrong..den i noe wat it is..
i juz havta say...

u keep on making assumptions..
u keep on saying im being pulled back..
u keep on saying dat im not moving on..

den wat the hell m i doin?for funs sake?*sounds familiar?*

gush..
i dunno wat else to say..
u go figure..

the family potrait

2006-10-16T08:12:00.000-07:00

i've had enuf with it! i cant help it everyone expect me to do this and that while my sister shakes her leg or okok..maybe did one or two tyngs.. and da best part it...it suddenly becums my job permanently!! wats the job of mom? okok..working mom? or maybe a sister.. if dey just sit and expect everytyng to be running smoothly.. laundry must be done..clothes must be fold.. kitchen must be clean..food must be on top of the table blablablablaBLAH!!!

i've been doin dat since i already learn maths n now i have a sister n i dun get dat much help frm her? not even a word of appreciation but more demands??! i've had it! im tired n i juz need a rest fr todae.. im sick and giddy but i got dat reaction frm dem?!

nuff said.. i've had it..

i cant wait to go work tomorrow..
away from everytyng..i mean everytyng in dis house...

again im feeling unappreciated..

='(

3 more daes to sweet 17

2006-10-15T18:32:00.000-07:00

oh ya..i forgot..

3 more daes to sweet 17

=D

the day i know the truth

2006-10-15T17:51:00.000-07:00

now i noe the truth ..
one think dats solved in my mind ..
but i hope it wont affect our friendship for now ..
lets see where it leading me too ..

so aniwae, i went to meet riss and follow her buy her baju kurung and we chill at starbucks..
gah..as usual..she couldnt care less wen it comes to baju kurong.. she basically take wats on da display and dats it..hahaha..
yeah.. i usta b like her.. kinda tomboyish but dang..we love to fight.. i grew dat way.. but mebbe as i separate from dem i get to be more in touch with my feminine side..haha.. but riss, i still hav my skills hor..lol!! i miss the good old days.. i usta live with two of my kuzz n both are guys.. everyday without fail we play wrestling and boxing.. we really climb and jump n punch..hahaha.. mebbe dat figures why i love hanging out with guys..haha

after dat we meet 'tiger',zul n suhayl(i tynk) at bugis junc.. yup2.. da plan was actually to break fast togeder but den 'tiger' laz min change the tyme.. so yeah.. met dem at the arcade area den we head to amirahs.. met emoranger,shahrin n 'ungklak'..okok..since u guys got nick names i use dat ok?..haha.. so the sheesha was fine..but my tummy wasnt.. i wasnt feeling so good at all.. i keep on gettin goosebumps..

i found out wat i alwaez had been tynking of..
i dunno weder to smile or to not..
coz i like the msg i receive..
but i cant be seen smiling..
so yeah..
okok..nuff said..
*zip mouth*

so yesterdae my tummy hurts dat i vomit..n i was shivering..ppl in the train tot i was drunk..even my dad tot im drunk..lol! n i lost my money..yup2.. my whole savings..!!!
i tot by puttin it in anoder purse i could save my money.. well, i ended up loosing all..
im so careless!! dats one tyng i hate bout myself!! but i didnt take out dat purse at all!! so im left with my ten bux(i just borrow) plus my 5 bux in my wallet for me till 16 november..yup2.. haiz..

so i went home n i was talking to my best old 'kaki' ricardo.. he was basically makin me laugh all the tyme dat i was feelin a lil ok..he called me a 'masturbator' n i call him horny dog!! bah! hes one of my three kakis dat im with at skewl.. miss three of dem so much! haha.. at least sumone calls me on my hp..coz i have free incomin but i rarely receive calls..i mean for the one i wanna ans..=D n i sms alot..i can sms till i finish my pre on da day itself..like now..i juz topup n now it left 4 plus..bah! i tynk i gotta deactivate my incomin..or tell em my keypad spoilt n i cant sms..haha..

well..i dunno wat i wrote in my post coz im lazy to read..so yeah..any error..sorry ayte?=)

n thnx to all for showing ur concern..=)
i feel loved..gah! yeah2.. watever

4 more daes to my sweet 17..

2006-10-14T16:00:00.000-07:00

so yeah..
i kinda lost count...silly me
so its 4 more days to sweet 17..

gah! ppl ask me if im goin to throw a party or sumtyng..
shyte, wat dey dunno is dat im broke!
not exactly broke but broke to have a party..

i cant wait to start werk..
n get my pay so i can buy my own mp3..
a 3g phone..n mebbe psp..gah!
i keep on dreaming..
i just wanna take back watever i lost..
im actually hinting to dia farking parasite!bah!

and i wanna do sumtyng bout my hair!! coz i find too boring..
i cant believe for 2 yrs i didnt touch my hair!
woah..cant believe its oredy dat long! =D
i cant cut it animore..
but i want it colored but i like it black..
den ders this few strands of my hair dat still have its blonde..
but it looks like white hair..fark~~lol!

ohya..todae gonna go sheesha..
with da same sheesha fwen..
haha..
wat a name..
sheesha fren.. haha.. coz da only place dey go is sheeshaaaaaaa...
den got stoned..bah! i wonder how come i never got stoned..
mebbe sleepy but stoned for sheeshaa??
hmm..mebbe todae i shud try to 'suck' longer..bah!
what am i saying?!=D

well, basically tyngs are not fine with my life..
from family, to financial(especially dat), to loved ones..blablabla
but yeah..i still have this smile on my face..
i wanna let it go here but it seems like more n more ppl discovered my blog..
and dey go "ouh so this is eeqa blog"
or "so, this is nyonya's blog"..bah!
so i cant hide it anymore...
and now i wont put much abt my personal life..
i mean the ones about family n all..
coz i remember writing it b4 n da next dae i came to skewl
everyone ask me if i was okay..wtf?!
hahahaa..

ohyar.. emoranger..shyte..
cant call him dat since lotsa ppl noe who he is..
so yeah its him..=D
kinda have sum misunderstanding but we're good..
n to emoranger, go and stand up and try!!
ur blog bcumin more n more emo arhx dis daez...
if u juz sit n wonder and feeling the pain ONLY..
den mine s well u gave up..
coz love needs effort..
are u making one?
omg! i criuzly sound like a love doctor!bah!
as im writing dis..
actually i wanna write more but den i realise its not my prob..lol!
i dunno..but i alwaez have tyngs to say wen it cums to sumtyng dat im unsatisfied with..

like wat ppl do..
or blah! forget it..haha..
its too long..now im lazy to write..
hhahahah!!

aniwae, i gav up on love..
sumhow i just feel i just wanna let go of wat i alwaez believe..
every love just hurt wen its about to feel right..
and i feel unappreciated..
maybe im expecting too much but den again..
i want the best for my own and im a lady..
i need know if im worth your effort..
seems like i was never special to anyone..
dey take me for granted..
and yes, i dun fall for a new sumone dat easily..
coz i only fall for sumone hu dun show any interest in me..haha
weird urh? but cute..
so yerp.. im still young..
so i still hav lotsa time to find my prince..
gah! wat a phrase..
my prince!!*laugh out loud while touching stomach*

oh ya..speakin of laugh out loud..
im now talking to this hantu..
n he alwaez love to say silly tyngs dat make me laugh..
all i can say is..go sleep!!
lol!!

omg..dis is the longest post i've ever done dats without lyric of song..
hahahahaha!!!
*slap myself*

4 more daes to sweet 17

2006-10-14T00:36:00.000-07:00

5 more daes to sweet seventeen

i dunno why im counting down to da daes.. i mean im working on dat dae and der is no party..yerp2.. haiz..
mebbe just the feeling of being one yr older haha..

so aniwae..i was msgin him when 'My Heart' song came out on the radio..
haha..
i just feel weird like talking to him now..
its like there is this gap..
i shouldnt get close..
i knew this would happen..
sumtymes i wish we are like normal..
like the first time we talk..
i dunno..
its just different..
maybe im da one dat feel dat way..
well..
i wish tyngs are ok..=)

tomorrow suppose to go break fasting with sum frens..
but i tynk its not gonna happen..bah!
=D
haha..
so sunday..anione?
hahaha

im crappin coz todae is sucha boring dae for me..bah!
n as i read back my recent post..
i realise lotsa grammar errors n typos..
gahhahaha..
n sumone tot dat im a bruneian or sabahan coz i use 'bah'..
haha..
im indo-chn..
ok?=)

girls nyte out

2006-10-13T14:22:00.000-07:00

went with my mom
and my sis
and see.. its reserved for the lovely nyonya..lol!
so basically i dump all veggies to my moms plate..
and leave the meat n cheese der and put my tons of chilli..
im so bored coz i cant sleep n its now 5.16 am..
dun trust the tyme below..
im juz lazy to change it..=D

so i tot i juz talk abit bout the girls nyte out at pizzahut dat dae..haha

i had fun..

but tho i ate abt one pan of pizza..

criuzly its not enuff!!

anione wanna blanja me pizza on my bdae?..

haha

oh ya..im gonna start counting down the daes to my bdae..

so it starts now..

6 more daes to my sweet 17

im in my worst state

2006-10-13T13:36:00.001-07:00

sad to see how unkind u can be...
then now i know that actually i wasnt the one...

we rarely talk..
n now i know that its gonna be weird to talk to you again..
i mean our last conversation was me juz shutting down our conversation..

im in my worst state..
but still ders a smile on me..

well, you might not know..
coz i wasnt the one..

i sat n tynk..
im confuse..
very..

coz if i wasnt da one..
why are you always talking bout my past?
izeet out of jealousy?
or are u juz plain concern?

bah!
im crappin..

coz dats wat im feelin now..
crappy..

i wish he would sumday ring me up
n take me away from all this..

aniwae, sorry if u guys cant understand my post b4 this.. it was not meant to be read..i juz need to type shytes sumwher.. i dun havta fake myself.. aniwae..bah!im so not feeling ryte.. n i cant wait to start werk! keeps me occupied..

2006-10-13T03:32:00.000-07:00

ders like no one here ..

no one at all..

not even a friend..

n now i need one..

coz i really really am not feeling fine..

im crying non stop..

i dunno why da hell i wrote this post..

just feel like typing sumtyng..

coz i dunno wat else to do..

fark!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

3g t578e,

unappreciate

2006-10-13T03:26:00.000-07:00

Chorus:]

I'm feeling really unappreciated.
You takin` my love for granted, babe.
I don't know how much more,
I can take from you.
You don't do the things you use to do.
You don't even say I love you too.
and lately I've been feeling,
Feeling unappreciated.

[Verse 1:]

Woke up this morning and saw your face
And you didn't look the same as yesterday.
I got the feeling that you can't seem to see,
What you want to be.
And lately it ain't been the same at all.
When you're here its like I'm invisable
I still can't seem to see where I went wrong.
Cuz I'm feeling

[Chorus:]

I'm feeling really unappreciated.
You takin` my love for granted, babe.
I don't know how much more,
I can take from you.
You don't do the things you use to do.
You don't even say I love you too.
and lately I've been feeling,
Feeling unappreciated.

[Verse 2:]

Lately our house is not a home
You come in, take a shower and then say I'm gone.
what am I to do
With my heart just leave
But my feet won't move
Today is our anniversary
But you haven't even say two words to me
I'm trying hard to give you another chance
But ooh baby I'm feeling

I'm feeling really unappreciated.
You takin` my love for granted, babe.
I don't know how much more,
I can take from you.
You don't do the things you use to do.
You don't even say I love you too.
and lately I've been feeling,
Feeling unappreciated.

[Verse 3:]

Oh when I first met you
I thought you was the most perfect man
That I ever seen
I still don't understand why
You treat me like you do
I use to give into your lust
Now I see the truth
Oh no I don't want to hear it all through
Yea I know I'll still be missing you
But it's not worth the pain
That came from you
You made me feel
unappreciated

[Chorus:]

I'm feeling really unappreciated.
You takin` my love for granted, babe.
I don't know how much more,
I can take from you.
You don't do the things you use to do.
You don't even say I love you too.
and lately I've been feeling,
Feeling unappreciated.

Don't love me no more
Heeey wooo hooo
unapreciated.
I'm feeling unappreciated

i feel so tupid!!!

stop pestering us!!

2006-10-12T01:36:00.000-07:00

the reason i update coz emoranger say if i never update he wont comment my pics..
oh ya..
so emoranger..go comment..lalalalaa

to all hu have myspace..
comment back ok?..haha

i dunno but its kinda fun comment2 ppls pic..
haha..so if u want me to comment juz tell me k?

aniwae..
this tyng happens to me n my sis..
ppl ask us to download songs for em..
ppl ask us to upload their pics for em..
ppl ask us to edit pics for em..
ppl ask us to do their layout for em..
haiyo..

plz learn..
i mean we dun mind but plz appreciate whatever we did??
we are oredy busy with lotsa ppl asking for us the same tyng..
so stop pestering us..
haha..

dat figures why i appear offline on msn?
good..
haha...

aniwae..todae i goin to eat pizza..
yeah..
cant wait..

n btw..i still haben shower...
so still in smelly state..
haha

assumption

2006-10-11T08:59:00.000-07:00

okok..i got this oder job..and it starts monday..
tynk i chose this coz i still haben heard of the oder job..
so yerp2..

aniwae, rockstar was being good todae..
i was smiling as der is no problem at all..=)=)

you keep on assuming..
are you hiding sumtyng?
or u knew..?
its kinda crazy to listen to the same assumption every tyme..
coz watever ur assuming is wrong..
its all about you...

my heart

2006-10-11T08:42:00.000-07:00

Disini
kau dan aku
terbiasa bersama
menjalani kasih sayang
bahagia kudenganmu

pernahkah
kau menguntai
hari paling indah
ku ukir nama kita berdua
disini surga kita

bila kita mencintai yg lain
mungkin kah hati ini akan tegar
sebisa mungkin
tak akan pernah
sayang ku akan hilang

if u love somebody
could we be this strong
i will fight to win
our love will conquer all
wouldn’t risk my love
even just one night
our love will stay in my heart
my heart

pernahkah
kau menguntai
hari paling indah
ku ukir nama kita berdua
disini surga kita

bila kita mencintai yg lain
mungkin kah hati ini akan tegar
sebisa mungkin tak akan pernah
sayang ku akan hilang

bila kita mencintai yg lain
mungkin kah hati ini akan tegar
sebisa mungkin tak akan pernah
sayang ku akan hilang

if u love somebody
could we be this strong
i will fight to win
our love will conquer all
wouldn’t risk my love
even just one night
our love will stay in my heart
my heart

omg!da song is so nice! i mean i saw the movie..ok..its boring..but the ending really make you cry..the very last ending makes you cry much more!! haha.. its not dat im emo..its the show!! so sad!!!

this song is for him..
one moment u tynk he likes you..
anoder moment its not..
but he keeps on talking bout my life..
what does it means?
is all dat me?
or is jus sumone else?
watever it is..
my feelings for you i keep deep in my heart..
i wouldnt want to risk saying..

wouldnt risk my love..
even for one night..
our love will stay in my heart..

guys are like ezlink

2006-10-10T18:40:00.000-07:00

guyz are like ezlinks..
dey tap n go..
tap..n go..
i got dat frm my friend
haha..
haiyo...

aniwae, i dun understamd what are guys intention when they wanna make friends with me.. they were alwaez expecting more..
expecting me to reply..
expecting me to msg..
hello! im using a prepaid!!
n its scary wen guys just starts to msg u saying "y never reply?" "y never pick up my calls?"
well..excuse me...its my f**king problem!duh!

so yeah..i hate wen after a one call, they day they fall for me..i mean..wtf?! get real dudeS..

never he fail to accompany my day..
my nights..
my lonely hours..
even when i need sumone..
his words will always makes me smile..
but im scared to step infront sumtymes..
scared of mistakes..
is dat me?
or am i just dreamin?
but in both ways..
its scary..
coz im scared to be in love again
n also i dun wanna be the only one wishing..
but honestly..
u are on my mind..

albert meet windy bridge

2006-10-09T22:42:00.000-07:00

psst...

i got the job!

haha..yeah..n i havta thnx Dic for dat..so THANKYOU!!

n den teman him for awhile to buy his lipring..miss Dic lah.. haha.. he still da funny lameass guy ..sweet sweet him..lol

then met emoranger..haha..da names stuck on him..lol..
so aniwae, b4 buke we walk arnd to nowher n den went to this haunted plaza to play pool..
yup2..dat table tyngy wher u shoot small balls with the long stick..okok..
i sound wrong..=D.. i suck at it big tyme.. hey,its my 2nd tyme.. but he's good..=D haha...

so aniwae,den we go beachrd to break-fast and eat..wah!!i miss dat red red mee!! so sedap!! but not dat spicy..i was so full dat i havta tuck in my stomach for 30 mins for it to cum back to its original size..

parasite was arnd my area so i tot of killing tyme..so we went to esplanade to go windy bridge.. saw lush..n guess wat?..my gurl juz hug me!! yeah.. she read my blog..n i dunno but tyngs are ok oredy..i miss her!! so so much!! im hoping ders pract todae so i can meet her again..haha..when she hug me its like she brightens up my life..dats how wonderful a friendship can be..=)=)

so yerp..at windy bridge we talk talk n sing sing.. kill kill time..=D
he is really really a deep person.. never expected him to be dat way..=) but then his stories are so interesting..i mean its shocking to hear der is such cruel ppl inlife.. all i can say is BITCH..yeah..*smile at emoranger* ohya..nex tyme wen u r down..juz wake me up.. i dunno.. im a friend hu hates to see friends dat are not smiling..=)

so yesterday i really had fun..thnx to my gurl n emoranger..=)

parasite parasite!!

2006-10-08T20:21:00.000-07:00

parasite called me.. haha.. i knew he gonna call..
he's such a loser..
this is what happens when u dun appreciate people..

yesterdae went to orchard to shop shop shop..
yeah.. with my parents, kak ct n syq...
so we took a car..
my dad drive..
so kinda kecoh inda car..lol!!

i bought this one heel dats so green!!
n dey say its a very very high heel..haha
den we went to geylang..
we nearly got hit by a bus..
damn bus!!!
but we are all safe..
=)=)
n i gotta say, ayam penyet at lucky plaza is so so so nice!!!!!
u guys shud try..
i gtg..
gotta shower n go meet Dic..
yearp2... goin interview..
*cross finger*

and now emoranger becums cupid..haha
he betta stop..really!!lol
hahahaha...
oh..he just msg..
*check hp*

"i saw this bangla walkin wearin his sarong and his ehem was standing"

LOL!!

call me when you are sober

2006-10-08T20:08:00.000-07:00

i am so bored..

and im tired of sobbing..

yeah...

i wanna move on..

i wanna smile..

but then he have a different heart..

he dun know how i feel..

i dun tynk he got a clue..

let's keep it this way..

i thought wat im feelin is sumtyng special..

guess its not..

how embarassing..

=]=]=]

lol

at last can see emoranger..lol!

2006-10-07T10:38:00.000-07:00

wen guys hurt us
we love our uncle jeff!!
lonely emoranger n friends..=D
I went out to almajlis with my parents.. yup2..i never go iftar coz my sister got busted as she lied to my mom.. n my aunt and all.. haiyo.. so yerp2..

den we went to almajlis n im supposed to meet emoranger coz he said dat i 'buey' him all the tyme..lol! haha...

so after dat we went camwhoring leaving my parents at al majlis with my uncle! haha..yup2..my uncle jeff n riss is der..i miss dem!! heex

den i went to meet emoranger n friends..

so we chill der..

it was amazing on how we unplanned and ended up wearing white! haha

so yerp2..it turns out to b fun tho i miss the iftar...

n oh yar...i met parasite again!! urgh! hes so disgusting.. n people!!i got over him!! really! haha..

yup..dats all..urmm..

okok...i miss my rockstar..

to dee

2006-10-05T18:03:00.000-07:00

its hard to say but sum people are so naive to listen to madeup stories..
its hurtful wen u own friends turn u down..
it hurts wen u are not talking to dem animore..
i read the blog and it seems like stories is abt me..
well, i kinda feel it..
coz we didnt talk to each other..
if its me..den listen..
okok..gettit straight..
i was just explaining to ppl wat actually happen n i dun tynk at dat incident both of us are at fault..
we had misunderstanding in the msn conversation..
dats fine..coz i completely get over it..
i see u n try to act normal but it seems like i aint the one making faces..

seriously, i miss you..n i still love u as a friend..
but i dun understand why must all this go to waste..
i help u and try to be der wen u down..
and u were der wen i have nobody..
i really2 miss dat..everytyng abt dat..
i was worried wen u wrote at ur blog abt ur life..
coz i noe wat ur goin thru..
i've been der and u noe dat..
so aniwae,i dun gettit why must i say bad tyngs abt u..
or maybe anoder misunderstanding of sum conversation?..
i dunno..
but i wish u all the best..
my dear friend..

4a3

2006-10-05T02:34:00.000-07:00

jabat tanganku,untuk yg terakhir kali,kita berbincang tentang memori di masa itu,pelik tubuhku,usapkan juga air mataku,kita terharu seakan tiada bertemu lagi,bersenang-senanglah karna waktu ini yang kan kita, banggakan di hari tua,sampai jumpa kawan ku s'moga kita selalu,menjadi sebuah kisah klasik untuk masa depan,mungkin diriku masih ingin bersama kalian,mungkin jiwaku masih haus sanjungan kalian

i love this song..so much..
this lines are dedicated to my 4a3..
all of you..
i will miss you guys so much..
tomorrow is my last paper..and im outta dat sch..

i miss my class.. we go thru alot together..
frm retaining..
to gettin into a WHOLE lotsa trouble..
to playing pranks..
haha..
to truancy..
latecoming..
haha..
im so gonna miss em!!

tetrina-the loud girl
agnes-the nuisance nerd
evelyn-IDIOT!!lol
teresa-i totally admire ur leadership n responsibility..
shudong-my lovely sotong!!sing good national day songs horhx!!
xian yao-be a chef!u cook nice food!!
yanfei-ey you shanghai boy!! haha..
tu miao-dun sleep again horhx!! lol
marshall-hey horny camel!!haha
chenling-hey,mix arnd ayte?=)
alif-set ur goals..u are the nicest n mature guy in our sch..=)
nuhad-dtg skola!!!haha
haiyu-gy tutop mp3!!blaja!
wawa-curly bitch!i will miss u the most!haha
nana-remember we usta go sch togeder?..haha..ur smart..keep on studying gurl=)
marni-wey minah indon!! slamat maju jaya ya?jgn lupain gue!!heex
muhd-dah2..cinta2 jek.. i hav the feelin ur gonna be scientist wen u grow up..lol
shahir-dun boast to much! but gonna miss ur irritating-ness
benjamin-focus n relax!!haha..u nid to breath dude!haha
jiekai-wey!nex tyme got cigarettes tell us horhx! lol
tsu haw-keep on breaking okae bboy?=)

i miss you all larhx!!!

we play hard

we study smart

die together

a3'06 forever

=')

friends

2006-10-05T01:48:00.000-07:00

fahmy
prada
baybee
dee
ritz
susu
albert
haiyu
nuhad
wawa
faruq
fred
jark
apit
nana
marni
tetrina
agnes
evelyn
teresa
shahir
muhd
alif
maz
tapa
elly
fasha
qamah
hakim
and you!dats reading my blog!
...
....
....
and lots more..

okok..the reason i did this is to show how much friendship means to me..

ritz n susu

u guys are my friends..
and i hate to see both my friends fighting for over a small matter..
yes,i noe it hurts.. but u gotta learn how to listen,forgive n forget..
ritz have a point..
he's just using the name funkout to open a new crew..
he have the right to choose who he wants to be in dat crew..
this funkout is differet den da funkout at dancefloor..
he's not the leader...
but more of a founder..of the new funkout..
and susu is hurt..
i know u are sweety..
and especially ur super bestfriend is not talking to u bcoz of ritz..
but its not really his fault..
dun u see?
ritz is gettin the blame..
u talk abt him on ur blog,bulletin n to all ur gfs at myspace..
u are giving him a bad name..
but he just kept quiet trying to explain to u..
u guys shud talk..
im not siding anyone..
coz both of u are so special to me..

plz guys.. its just a misunderstanding..

friends forever?

adek hot

2006-10-02T21:15:00.000-07:00

okok.u go click urself to see how my sister looks like last time..hahahahah!!

aniwae, im done with maths paper 1,history, and english.. 3 more papers n im outta school..now finding for a job..help anione??..haha
oh ya,my handphone credit is low..AGAIN..i hate using prepaid cards!! but i hate bills too!!haha..
rockstar been busy with work..well,he's alwasy bz when it comes to me..it seems dat way coz he is now making more den 3 excuses per day..dats so not him..he will msg all this hurtful msges den at nyte he will say "i love u sweetheart..nytes.." wtf?! he's playin arnd wit my feelings again..
haiz..i dun care anymore..i hate him..seriously i do..but to let him go..its like a big step..i noe i need him..i need him to change.i believe he can..but sumtymes i feel like im the fool..

oh ya,my comps crashed dat day..and all my files are gone..yup2..the pictures..the music...the video..n da best part is i sell my cameraphone to a normal handphone..n my digicam spoil..I CANT TAKE PICTUREZ!! gawsh!! gotta get a job quick..so i can buy digicam..

n im wondering whether i be getting the v3x or not... coz if not den i'll curse myself for selling my handphone!!

thanksz to my blog 2

2006-09-26T02:59:00.000-07:00

Oh ya! hady is the new SINGAPORE IDOL!! yeah!!

i knew from the first time i see him sing at the audition..

aniwae,yup2...dats the necklace he gav..actually..i dun expect him to buy for me mickey mouse..but..urmm..hey,its sweet ok?!=D

so i love it.. heex..

n nex week is my last week living in a sec sch life.. anione noe any part time job vacancy??

2006-09-24T00:10:00.000-07:00

**nyonya**

lush make it to dancefloor audtion..yeah..
congrats to filzy,kimmie,tapa,maz,dee and elly...

oh ya,happy birthday dee! yes2..one of our hot female dancers had turn legally 18!! so best wishes to dee!

slamat berpuasa!!

2006-09-23T23:29:00.000-07:00

thanks to my blog..

rockstar show his appreciation..

heehee

n i got a necklace..wee!~~

thanks rockstar..

oh ya, cow msg rockstar dat day..(yup2..she aint dead yet).. she was like saying "i cant forget you!.. i hate you coz i miss you!..i told myself not to sms you..i hate you coz u cant get a grip of yourself..(meaning coz he's still with me)"..wtf!

watever.. she's da one hu suppose to get a grip..

well,slamat berpuasa to all muslim..=) oh ya,todae gonna go eat lontong for break-fast with the whole family at my granny's house..yeah..like old tyme!!..everyone's gonna be der..now my mom listening to hari raya song..very the smangat..n she's very2 irritating..lol!!

just now sahur we ate rice n my mom's sambal ikan bilis(which turns out...urm..wrong)..lol!! good tyng got fishball..haha..i miss mak..her "gy minom air!!"..haha..miss her.. maybe one of dis day im gonna go sleep her house..

cant wait to eat togeder..listening to my niece's crap..haha..her "balik kampung dubai!" n "potong bebek UNGsangkarable" haha..cant wait!!

ohya,watch s'pore idol finals today ok?..=)